"Well, guess he won't be needing me anymore. What does an actor want with a conscience, anyway?" -Jiminy Cricket. Damn, shade.
Initial thoughts before viewing: I was not looking forward to watching Pinocchio. It was one of the MANY classic Disney movies had on VHS as a kid, and I rarely watched it. Frankly, I remember it being boring. I don't even like getting on the Pinocchio dark ride at Disneyland. It's just never been one of my favorites. I KNOW that critically, Pinocchio is a darling and at the top of the pack when it comes to Disney's collected works. I was hoping that a true re-watch would give me a new perspective and allow me to gain more appreciation for this classic.
Pinocchio also makes me think of this other movie...
...which I know NOW was not at all created by Disney, but still that live-action puppet version haunts me. I only saw this because of JTT, and his beautiful face was barely in it. But I digress...let's get to it!
If you've never seen Pinocchio or need a refresher, here is a link to the movie's Disney Wiki page where you can read the plot summary.
Highlights:
I may be biased because I have my own sassy tuxedo cat, but Geppetto's cat Figaro is clearly the star of this movie. Figaro was also Walt Disney's favorite character in Pinocchio and pushed to have him in more and more scenes. I mean, LOOK AT HIM. He's adorable, sassy, loyal, and just so sweet I want to squish his little face. When at Disneyland, I always go visit him at the Fantasy Faire area (my own personal pic of Figaro below). 😻
Disliked: One of my major gripes with this movie has always been the fact that it has 5 villains. Yes, FIVE. From the top left to right we have: Honest John, Gideon, Stromboli, the Coachman, and Monstro the whale. Pinocchio goes from one bad situation to the next, each getting progressively worse. Pinocchio is like a day old and knows nothing about the world - give him a break!
Random Thoughts I had While Watching:
Jiminy Cricket is not the best conscience. Or cricket. He has a rocky start and sleeps in on Pinocchio's first day of school. By the time he catches up with him, Pinocchio has already crossed paths with the first set of villains (Honest John and Gideon) who convince him to forget about school and be an actor. Jiminy also completely abandons Pinocchio out of frustration two times in the movie. His loyalty and devotion towards Pinocchio does grow, however, and by the climax of the movie he is firmly by his side as they face Monstro the whale. Side note: Does everyone just ignore the fact that Jiminy looks NOTHING like a cricket? He is, in fact, a tiny green man in a top hat.
“Give a bad boy enough rope, and he'll soon make a jackass of himself.” - The Coachman. Can they say jackass in a Disney movie? And they definitely say it more than once. The whole Pleasure Island part of the movie is pretty shocking. Here, Pinocchio has devolved into full bad boy mode, smoking cigars and drinking beer with all the other terrible youths (boys only though, because girls are incapable of being naughty apparently).
The infamous donkey scene. The source of so many children's nightmares. It's scary and sad, but also pretty brief. My biggest issue with this part of the movie is not that it's so potentially traumatizing visually, but the fact that this whole donkey-child trafficking plot line goes unresolved. Pinocchio escapes the situation by jumping into the ocean with Jiminy Cricket. That's it. No other mention or resolution for the donkey boys sold to the salt mines. The movie ends with its happily ever after, Pinocchio gets to be a real boy, everyone is celebrating and dancing, but I was left wondering...WTF happened to Lampwick and all the other boys-turned-donkeys?! No happy ending for them, I guess. It feels like sloppy storytelling to leave such a critical storyline unresolved.
Closing Thoughts:
Did I find a new love for Pinocchio? Eh, not really. I did almost fall asleep a few times while watching (the first part of the movie feels quite slow). I can (and do) appreciate the technical beauty and craftsmanship of the movie. The backgrounds are gorgeous and warm (this is in part thanks to the use of Disney's innovative multiplane camera, which created depth and astounding detail for shots). The songs are catchy and pleasant, with "When You Wish Upon s Star"sung by Jiminy in the opening as as the obvious standout. This song was the first in a long line of Disney tunes to win the Oscar for Best Original Song. It's also become an anthem for the Walt Disney Company itself and is played alongside the opening logo before a movie. This is all a big deal should be recognized. But that leads me to my next point...
I can appreciate Pinocchio without actually liking it. It's never going to hold a special place in my heart. I'm never going to want to watch it for enjoyment. Aside from Figaro, who is obviously a favorite of mine, there's not much I personally like about this movie. I mostly feel really bad for Pinocchio and old Geppetto throughout the film, and it sort of gives me anxiety to watch them both suffer through it.
My Rating: 4.5/10
Two down...56 to go!
My Rating Scale/System:
10 - Masterpiece / Award Worthy 🤩
9 - Almost perfect / Exceptional 🥰
8 - Great / Well-crafted 😁
7 - Good / Noteworthy 😊
6 - Above average / Memorable 🙂
5 - Solidly average 😐
4 - Mixed feelings / Mediocre 😕
3 - Uninteresting / Struggle bus 🥱
2 - Barely watchable 😡
1 - Failure / Why is this a thing? 💩
